I’ve been feeling quite misanthropic lately and am also, rather strangely, feeling a little guilty over said feeling. It’s bizarre. I mean there are many excellent reasons to be a misanthrope: the selfishness of the average human, the moronic idiocy of so many, the drearily repetitive nature of human life, the misery people inflict on each other (not to mention on animals) and so on. And yet I do still feel a tad guilty. Perhaps it’s because as an antinatalist you’re committed to the prevention of human suffering, and so there would seem to be a corollary that therefore you should value human beings in and of themselves. Yet I find that outside of the small circle of individuals that feature in my own life, I really don’t give a fuck, and, more than that, I tend to find myself reacting more and more with a weary disgust at the sight of humanity. So it would seem that in my case at least it’s a matter of principles over people: I don’t want to see suffering, yet I don’t really care for the average human in his or her normal happy-clapping, ego-satisfying, need-gratifying, self-obsessed mode of being. I wish they’d just all fuck off and leave me in peace, or that I could fuck off and live in the hills and never have to see too many of them together in one place again. So it’s kind of strange, I place more importance on the suffering than the person, although now that I reflect on it, I guess doctors are the same: they don’t give a fuck about you, they’re just there to relieve any mechanical woes your body may be experiencing.
So yes, hating humanity and yet not wanting to see them suffer. Very odd. Anyone else feel the same?
(Apologies as per always lately for the quality of the posts. Jaded, weary, can’t see any point to life, don’t know how I’m going to get through the next forty years etc.)